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Relationship Between Mother and Bride

The emotions felt at weddings are different for men and woman. It is an especially emotional experience for the woman, and maybe most of all for the mother and daughter. Looking for a wedding gown is special moment between mother and daughter as it is a moment of transition. The wedding dress signifies a separation from the old life that has been and the new life that is yet to come. Many brides to be goes through a series of emotions and thoughts, thinking about all their special moments starting with their childhood and leads up to the moment they are experiencing right now, wondering how it all came to be.

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As many young women are very close to their parents, and especially the mother, the family plays a big part of the wedding planning. There is daily communication between mother and daughter either face to face or over the phone. This can lead to challenging dynamics between mother and daughter as many mothers want to hold on to their daughters, and maybe they want to hold on to their own youth. Some mothers are so into being their daughters best friend that they dress way younger then what is appropriate for their age, desperately trying to hold on to her youth and to be associated as her daughters best friend, wanting people to think their sisters. And other mothers want to be such a big part of planning the wedding because they just want to plan the wedding they never had. With the decorations, the wedding dress, the photographer and the live music band. Most brides do want their mother to be part of the planning and decision making, as long as she doesn’t go over board. Sometimes a daughter sees her mother opinions and advice outdated.

As most families today don’t have more than three children, unlike in the old times where numbers of children were much higher. Today families are small, which means that the mother have the opportunity to give much more time to focus all her attention on her soon to be married daughter, it also mean that many brides to be gets spoiled and over indulged. Some brides goes through 12 to 15 different wedding dress stores just to find the perfect wedding dress, and the mother of the bride is happy to come along.

Watching a son or a daughter get married is emotional for parents. An American research showed that most parents don’t think that adulthood starts until the age of 26, the reason for this must be that most parents have no clue of when and how they should disengage from their children. But the interesting thing is that while the youth take their own good time growing up reaching adulthood, they are at the same time leaving their childhood more rapidly then ever before. Childhood is over by the age of 11 most parents believe. That means that young woman and young men spend 14 years in limbo.

There is no question about how difficult it is for parents to let go of their young men and young woman to set off on their own journey in life and watch them get married, but that as well as so many other things is just another thing called part of life.

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African wedding photography

 

Symbols Behind Wedding Bands

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The stories and symbolism behind wedding bands are numerous. Wedding bands are in the western cultures traditionally worn on the ring finger which is the fourth finger on the left hand. People spend anything from a couple of thousands to millions of dollars for this sentiment of love. The wedding band is just as important to the bride as their wedding gown. Though the tradition has been around for centuries no one can really say where the tradition originated from.

It could be so, as some believe, that the first time wedding rings were exchanged where in the ancient Egypt for more than 4800 years ago. It is well known that the Egyptians wore twisted and braided papyrus rings in those days. The circle have represented eternity for a very long time, it has no beginning and no end, by many cultures not only by the Egyptians. Even the space inside the circle had a meaning. The hole symbolized an entrance to the known and the unknown. When a man gave a woman a ring it symbolized that their love would be never ending and eternal.

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The rings and wedding accessories started out as being made of papyrus changed to be made of stronger and more lasting materials like bone and ivory, even leather. The value of the ring was a way of showing off the givers wealth, but more importantly it represented the love the giver had for the receiver.

The Romans soon followed the trend, not to offer a symbol of love, but a symbol of ownership. When a man gave a woman a ring it was to show the world that she was taken and belonged to someone. The rings were made of iron, and sometimes even had engravings on them.

The Christians didn’t follow the trend before the 860, where they started to use the ring in marriage ceremonies. Often the rings would be highly decorated with symbols and patterns, but was then changed in the 13th century to a much more plain band more similar to what is popular today, as it was frowned upon as being “heathenish” by the head of the church.

The diamond was introduced to the wedding ring in the 1400s when King Maximilian the 1st of Gerany proposed to Mary of Burgundy, as he offered her a diamond to seal his vow.

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Though the wedding ring have been worn on different fingers over the time including the thumb on both hands, it eventually settled on the tradition of the fourth left finger, as it was a Roman belief that there was a vein the “Vena Amoris”, “Vein of Love” in that finger that was directly connected to the heart. Though scientists have proven this to be wrong it is still a popular myth today.

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A more realistic theory of why married couples were the rings on the left fourth finger, and less romantic, could be the simple fact that precious metal would be less worn on that finger and hand, as it is much less exposed then the right hand.

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Photos by a Johannesburg wedding Photographer